Psychopaths Have Their Reasons
by aurin-clover
Summary: Tei Sukone. Always outcasted as a mere UTAU, always villainous as a Len-obsessed, sly teenager. Has nobody ever wondered why it happened? Why Tei was provoked to do all this? In the form of a tape recording, narrated by Rin, Teto and Tei, commentary by mostly Teto, though a few is by Rin and Tei
1. Sukone Tei: Orphan

Is this thing on...? Okay, I'm recording. Ahem.

My name is Kasane. Teto Kasane.

Ooh! I sound so cool! Like a secret agent! Yeah, I'm secret agent Teto!

Anyway, this isn't about me. Though I don't see why not. I'd make a great protagonist!

No, this is about Tei Sukone. She's my adoptive sister with a problem. Actually, multiple problems. But though you may not believe it, as you've always seen Tei as an antagonist, violent, obsessed with Len Kagamine. And I, Failing Secret Agent Teto, am here to tell you why she does all this, why she likes to hide in the cereal box, or how she even fits in there. Actually, nobody but Tei could tell you that... Argh! Stay on topic, Teto! Though I do admit I made the cereal thing up to hook the readerl. So let's start!

See, it all started in the cafeteria of our school, when I noticed a pair of glowing red eyes behind the coat rack. I knew immediately it was Tei, as I had been living with her since I was about five...

No, Teto, that's waaay to far into it.

THEN LET'S SEE YOU DO BETTER, KAGAMINE!

Okay then. Give me the recording thingy... Is it on? There's no light thingy, or anything to tell me that it's on... Okay. My name is Kagamine Rin, and now I'm telling the SCRIPTED story. Teto's pouting in the corner, over there, attempting to write a script. Also, I go to Tei's and Teto's high school as well. And Teto, well, Teto was off by 12 years.

What really happened here was this:

"Agh!" A clash sounded from the outside of the room. Most likely a crash from the beer bottle. The five-year-old was used to it by now. Her parents, Sakine Meito, and Sakine Haku were never really nice to each other, and they got in fights like this a lot. They never really paid attention to their young silver-headed little girl, even though a normal girl her age would need lots of care. No, the child stood there, a bored expression on her little face. She waited for it to end...

Well that's awful! No kid should have to go through that!

Close up, Teto! I'm the one with the script, okay? You... just... SHUSH!

But, Rin, that's child abuse! I'm calling the police!

Do not call the police! DO YOU WANT TO HEAR THE STORY OR NOT!?

Well, yeah...

Then SHUSH! And put your phone down! We are NOT calling the cops, Teto.

She waited for it to end, not daring to exit her room, for fear of being hit...

And then a magical unicorn came, and took her to a happy land where there were rainbows and butterflies and flowers!

What the... Teto, what was that? That is not what happened! Okay pause it. *Static* I've successfully tied up Teto, and locked her in the closet. Now maybe we can get through a sentence!

The Kindergarten was starting tomorrow, and she knew she was the only five-year-old who wouldn't attend. No, her parents would flip if she learned how to behave herself. Unlike they do. Oh, sure they'd be all friendly to someone of higher status...but to her, or their underlings... Gah! The little Tei didn't even want to think about it.

She stayed in her position on the floor, quietly humming "World is Mine" Though nobody knew her talents, Tei was a very good singer for a child. As her childish voice pierced through the silent air, besides some crashing, and screaming from outside (It sounds like Teto is trying to yell "CALL THE POLICE!" through the gag...I untie her. Readers, ignore her) What would happen if the world was really hers? Would she be a good Number 1 Princess? Or would she get selfish? Tei herself didn't know. She also had no idea that she was too young to worry about this at all!

"Tei! Tei! Get in here, girl!" Tei immediately pulled herself out of her fantasies, and ran as fast as her little legs could take her to the sound of her father's voice. He seemed to have...tears in his eyes? The young little girl saw the dead body of her mother, and her father weeping over it. A knife had gone through Haku's forehead.

Tei's red eyes widened at the sight of the corpse, "M-Ma-Mama?! MAMA!"

Haku Yowane-Sakine was already dead. Too dead to hear her daughter's cries. Meito spoke up suddenly, "I'm so sorry, Tei... I was too drunk to realize what I was doing... OH, GOD, I'M SUCH A HORRIBLE FATHER!" Listen, Tei, I want you to run as far as you can. Make it to a pink house owned by Uncle Ted and Aunt Luka -you remember them? Your mom's friends, they have a girl just your age-, and bang on the door until someone lets you in. Tell them your name, and that both your parents are dead. You should also change your surname to Sukone, an inside thing between Ted and I, okay?"

"B-But Papa..."

"Go, Tei! I'm not good enough to look after you. Haku, was, and that's why I'm going to go with her!" Meito grabbed the knife in Haku's head, and held near his own. "Go, Tei! Run!"

Tei grabbed her coat, and did what she was told, hurrying out the door at top speed. In the split second she looked back, she heard the sickening crunch of the knife piercing her father's skull.

And this is where I come in, right, Rin-chan? Oh, gosh, this is so sad! Poor little thing!

Hai, Teto, it is very sad... Oh, you can't cry, Teto! Not now, because it can only get better from here, right? Here, read the script to the reders!

O-okay... Now Tei... sh-she c-c-comes across a p-p-pink house... Sniff... where Kasane Ted, baby me, and Kasane Luka l-lived... Aw, Rin, can't you do it? I'm just a wreck of tears! Sniff...MEITOOO! HAKUUU!

Sigh... Tei eventually came to a pink house where Ted and Luka Kasane and their daughter Teto lived. Seeing Teto's child-sized bicycle, she decided this was the house to go to. Her small boots caked in blood went on tiptoe to reach the knocker.

The door opened to reveal a pleasant pink haired man carrying a little girl looking a lot like him on his back. It reminded Tei of how much she was said to look like Haku, and... Tei burst into tears there and then.

The little girl jumped from her fathers back, and hugged Tei tightly, "Nee, don't be sad. You can be okay." Teto helps Tei up, and shakes her hand, "I'm K'sane Teto! I'm a vegetable, too! A 'tato!"

Ted laughed. First she was French bread, now she's a potato... his daughter never ceased to amaze him. But what amazed him more was the sight of this little girl on his doorstep covered in blood. "Okay, Teto. Why don't you ask her who she is?"

"Okay!" Teto's pink drills bounced as she walked over to Tei, "What's your name?"

"Tei Sukone. My Papa and my Mama are both dead, and I have to go to this house."

Ted thought for a moment. Sukone meant healthy sound... Vegetables were healthy... Ah! Po pi po! Except for that weird twist Meito's girlfriend put on it...

Therefore, you should drink my dubious juice.

It costs a special 20 trillion dollars! (Though who in their right mind would pay that much for juice? Seriously...)

Midnight dubious juice!

Uneasy dubious juice!

Oh, so you had to choose NOW to butt in, Teto...

KO KI KO KI KO KO KI KO!

KO KI KO KI KO KO KI KO!

Proof that Teto does not speak Japanese: THE LYRICS ARE THE SAME AS PO PI PO!

Well, so-RRY if Ko Ki Ko isn't to your liking, Kagamine! But it's my song, and Papa mentions it here!

This isn't about you, it's about Tei. Do I need to tie you up again?

Yipe...continue!

Just then, Luka happened to come to ask Ted if he'd seen the tuna, and saw the bloody, bruised, and cut little girl on the doorstep. Her mother instincts kicked in immediately, "KYAAAA! The poor thing! (Sigh... It'd be awesome if parents were actually like this. Sadly, If I were to commit suicide, they probably would only care that there's nobody there to do Onii-chan's chores while he plays some weird video game about creepy robots and pizza that I couldn't care less about, or how they would sell my left-behind shoes.) Luka had Tei cleaned up, bandaged, and in Teto's clothes in a matter of 20 minutes. Luka really, really, REALLY, wanted to adopt this child, and take her in as their own. Ted somewhat disagreed-she looked so, so much like her dead mother...

Luka ended up convincing Ted to adopt this poor gorl- it wasn't like she'd know that she was adopted by the time she got older, as she was too young to remember a thing- She and Teto accepted each other as sisters.

Hold everything!

What is it now, Teto?

You mean to tell me Tei isn't really my kawaii little sister? KYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

...I think you should leave the room, Teto...Go sing Fukkireta for 10 hours again, or something.

Okay...

She and Teto accepted each other as sisters, and Tei began to grow. Luka and Ted were such nice parents, and even though Tei didn't have pink hair, and stuck out like a sore finger among them, Tei grew to love her new family, never even knowing she had had another. Or so they thought.

On the third Monday Tei stayed there, she had found an anthill in the yard, and was killing the ants one by one. When Teto came back from planting flowers to see what was going on, the little five-year-old asked, "Are you putting the ants down for naps, Onee-chan?"

Tei continued to stab the ants with her toothpick, "No, I'm ending their sorry little lives. Wanna try, Onee-chan? It gives a great feeling!" Tei held out a toothpick to Teto, who watched in terror as an ant failed to run away from Tei's toothpick of death. Tiny guts spilled out onto the grass. The more ants died, the happier Tei became. Soon, no more ants dared to emerge from the soil. They were all hiding in fear. Tei sat back on her knees, satisfied with her work. Teto's eyes had widened so much, she looked about to burst.

Tei definitely had some weird habits. She would sit on the ground in her room, and said that she was waiting for Ted and Luka to do the, "scary stuff" as she put it. It was obvious that this child had been very abused in her life, as if the signs of scars and bruises weren't enough to tell them, and so, instead of sending Tei to school, they would home school her, although Teto was ready and emotionally healthy enough to go.

Tei was always so excited to see her sister come home, that Ted and Luka thought she should try and go to school with Teto, for just one day in the fourth grade.

It went well, and Tei was definitely more behaved. She still had a few weird habits, and liked seeing death, but Ted and Luka thought she'd be okay in a middle school. Teto would go to the same one, as since they kept Tei out of school, she never knew anyone. So, at 11 years old, two girls were running to the bus stop, about to start sixth grade.

Rin-chan?

Oh~ Konnichiwa, Tei-chan. Speak of the devil!

Why are you reading my life from a script? And why is the cassette player on record?

Um... why don't you tell us what happens in middle school, Tei-chan?

What, me?

It's your story after all

Okay? I just came to tell you to gag Teto, who's singing Fukkireta nonstop. But I'll tell you about middle school...Yeah...that'll be fun...There was only one death report that year...

* * *

Konnichiwa... It's been a while hasn't it. My writing has definitely changed a lot, hasn't it. Of course, you probably weren't reading it before at all. And since nobody likes Tei Sukone... I-I thought she deserved a chance to be the heroine for a change. She's always the evil princess-oh, wait, that's Rin... Ah, forget it.

If you don't like it, that isn't my fault. G-Go read someone else's story... I'm not in the mood to deal with haters right now. A-And so what if a Luka x Ted shipping doesn't exist? I think they look kawaii together... Or Meito and Haku...


	2. Sukone Tei: Schoolgirl

I always knew I was adopted. Mama and Papa think I have no idea. I know how much I differ from them. I'm not bright, cheery, or pink-haired, and if Onee-chan and I really were twins, like they say, there was no way I would be like this. If I was misplaced at the hospital, then that would mean Teto would have to be also. And she looks so, so much like Ted. I can't really remember my parents. I don't know their names, or have any idea what they looked like. All I know is that my father committed suicide because he was so drunk, he murdered my mother. The rest of the memories...faded away over time.

So now there I was, walking to the bus stop with Onee-chan. Perfectly happy, knife hidden in my lunch pail just in case, and then..."KYA!" I knocked into a girl with short green hair, and she fell to the ground. She opened her mouth to speak, but then I cut in with a glare, "Watch where you're going, baka."

She took one look at my red eyes emitting pure rage, and yelped. She then stood up and started repeatedly bowing, "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry..."

I grimaced, and walked off, ignoring the green-haired girl. Teto was already on the bus. I sat down in the seat next to her. "Nee, Onee-chan?"

I looked up to see a worried expression on Teto's face. "Hm? Yeah, what is it?"

"Well, see that green-haired girl you ran into earlier?"

"She ran into me."

Teto gestured to the seat next to us. Tears were falling from the green-haired girl's eyes, and her red hoodie was pulled up over her head, revealing the creepy, cartoonish black-and-white face imprinted on the hood. I turned back to Teto, "So?"

"That's GUMI Megpoid... She gets bullied a lot, though she's nice to everyone. She's going through a state right now where, well..."

A girl with longer, darker green hair sat next to GUMI, "Nee, GUMI-chan? You okay?"

GUMI faced her friend, "I'm worthless, Sonika...I'm absolutely nothing...I should die...Yeah, I'll do that. I couldn't even keep myself from running into people...I'm completely useless...I'll just die..."

Her friend, probably named Sonika grabbed her shoulder, "NO! GUMI-chan, if I have to tie you up to keep you from jumping off the roof, or tell the teacher to make you use safety scissors just so you can't stab yourself again, I will! You know I will, GUMI Megpoid!"

I sniffed, "And I should care because..."

Teto huffed, "Fine! If you won't apologize, then I will!" She walked up to GUMI. She had extra time since the bus was out of gas, and was too big to fit into a gas station, "Um...Megpoid-san, my sister Tei says she's very sorry, and wants you to know that you aren't worthless or useless just because you ran into someone."

GUMI immediately hugged Teto. Okay, this girl had problems. More than I did. "Arigatou, Kasane-chan...Arigatou..."

We FINALLY arrived at the school... What with the baka bus driver who can't fill up his gas before the school day... GRR!

I imagine it went pretty well. Besides the fact I didn't know anyone besides Teto. Ever the social butterfly, she was on a first name basis with at least thirty other students, and on a last-name basis with about a hundred more! It seriously amazed me how social Onee-chan could be... But what amazed me more was one deadly word

Lunchtime.

Yes. I found myself with a bunch of hyperly happy people. A bunch of them. Courtesy of Teto. I will kill her. Except I don't want to because I love her. I need to vary the length of my sentences. And stop using short ones for drama. But you can blame the idiot author. Who's feelings my and Megpoid's problems were based off.

Wait, WAIT!

What is it, Rin-chan? Can I read the script... Why are you running over the story with a magnifying glass?

I DETECT RANDOMNESS! SHE'S GETTING OVER HER DEPRESSION, IF ONLY A LITTLE BIT!

So do you think she'll stay alive long enough to finish the story?

We can only hope. But let's get back on topic.

Right. I'm about to insult all of you, though...

Um, let's keep talking about our author who has attempted to commit suicide twice...I can't take insults

No! Auri can die, and no one will care! She has problems too.

Anyway, I hated it! It was all so annoying! I found myself squished between Teto and yet another pink-headed girl. She would've fit right in our family. Pairs of eyes, everywhere. EVERYWHERE! All staring at me, and judging me, wondering how I could possibly be related to Teto. I was about to crack, and I was so intense before I found myself being dragged off somewhere. Eyes shut tight, I tried to follow to where Teto -it must be Teto, right, who else would care about what happened to me?- leading me off to somewhere unknown. The hand let me go, and I collapsed to the ground, and curled myself into a ball, and waited for Teto to have her hyperactive reaction. It never came. Instead, a hand placed itself gently on mine crossed over my knees.

"Come on now, you can open your eyes." whispered a soothing voice to me. I obediently opened my red eyes to find myself staring at a pair of electic blue ones, slightly covered by messy blond hair. I panicked and shut my eyes tightly again, while holding my breath.

I heard rustling, as if someone was standing up from a seated position. Then mumbling. "You idiot, Len...I shouldn't have taken her...boy's restroom. But how...dragging her... boy in girl's restroom... Rin'll kill me. GAH!"

He saw me standing in front of him.. He had closed his own eyes while he was mumbling to himself, and I have a habit of being silent wherever I go. "Oh! You woke up!"

I just stood there, staring into his blue eyes. I felt like I could be there gazing at them all day...what? The last thought was too weird to have been me thinking it.

I freaked out then and there. I covered my face, and ran as fast as I could out of the..boys restroom? I WAS IN THE FREAKING BOYS RESTROOM!? Great. I was in the freaking boys restroom. And now I'm lost in the hall. Oh, wait, I have a map. DON'T I? It figures it's gone missing. I mean, who would carry a map during lunch? A total idiot. But now, it looks like I'm that idiot. Ah...I need to kill something! Panic! Panic! Panic! Of course nobody's in the hall during lunch break! Where's Teto, good at practically everything (humane) when you need her?

I ran across the school at full speed, searching for anything that might lead me to the cafeteria. Anything! Saiko Academy, why do you have to be such a big school? (A/N: I chose this because it describes both Teto and Tei. In Japanese, saiko means "great feeling" describing Teto, but in English, it's a homophone for psycho. Which is our friend Sukone. So I think it fits.)

Ah! Someone in the hall! I silently followed them, hoping they would go to the cafeteria. Some call it stalking, but I call it following. Because that's what it is. So there.

As soon as I saw the messy blond hair (which took me a while to see, as I didn't want to get too close...) I realized that it was the same boy who tried to help me when I broke down by dragging me into the boys bathroom...

Gah! A hand suddenly grasped the back of my uniform (A/N: It's Sugar Solider Miku's uniform, by the way) I turned around to see a girl with bright purple hair behind me. She was wearing a mischievous grin, along with a camera around her neck, and a pencil behind her ear. " _Pardonnez_ - _moi,_ but I couldn't help but notice you stalking Mr. Kagamine over there." She spoke with a light French accent, that just hypnotizes you...

I gave her my deth glare, "And who are you supposed to be, lolita? (Something I randomly read in Negima! I didn't know what it meant at the time, but Asuna yelled it to Ayaka, so it's probably an insult) Some kind of reporter, or something?"

She threw her hand in the air " _Oui_! I am Tone Rion. Let's just say gathering information about students enrolled at this school is... _un passe-temps de la mine_." (A/N: I'm not trying to offend the French, Rion looks really French to me...)

I sniffed, "Bah! I'm not stalking him, I'm trying to find the lunchroom. I also do not speak French!" The boy was gone now. My only hope was to ask this reporter girl for help, after she told me what was up with her meeting me.

"Alors... you say you aren't stalking him... I think otherwise."

"B-Be quiet! I've lost track of him now, and I'll never get to the lunchroom! So THANKS!"

"Je vous en prie... Anyway, I need some help, si'l vous plait, and you seem to be the kind of girl I can get it from, Tei Sukone!" Rion held up her camera. "This'd be the biggest story yet! Malheureusement, I don't have any kind of way to do it myself, but you, Tei... I can strike a deal with you, can't I?"

I nodded, suspiciously, "Hai, Tone-san. I never break a promise. But what exactly is this deal?

"Le triomphe! I knew you'd be my girl! So, I need information, and I see how quietly you move about." An evil glint flared in Rion's eyes, "Alors, I need you to follow the people I need info on, you come tell me the news, and I put it in the paper! _Astucieux_!"

I was unconvinced by her deal, "This isn't even a deal! This is you trying to abuse my ability, so do stop it. I'm not convinced, Tone-san"

" _Hé_! I do not abuse! I make use! And I was not done yet. _Alors_ , in exchange for that, I can make you or anyone else that you desire look really good or really bad in my articles! All I ask is for that information! Even I can't find out the secrets they hold when they talk alone! I can only sometimes get close friends to spill, but you are the image of stealth! Plus, not only can I alter the reputations of people at will, if you accidentally do something that is newsworthy, we can make you look as though it was accidental! So basically, we can alter the way people look at others however you want. You can even murder them, and it'd look okay. And for a girl like you, that may be needed. So, what do you say?"

I ignored her, "Exactly how would that be useful in any way? Buzz off."

Tone sighed, and left me. Without guiding me to the lunchroom. Just great. I then realized that I never gave her my name...

I finally found a map on the wall, and it led me to my next class. Before I walked in, the blond boy came running to the door! "NEEEEEEEEE! SUKONEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

He arrived out of breath and handed me my lunch pail, "You forgot your lunch pail..."

I bowed, "Arigatou. It was very considerate of you to retrieve it."

He gave me a smile, "No problem! I liked running across the school. Maybe now I won't have to take Physical Education! Yeah! In your face, gym teacher!"

I giggled against my will, "So," I asked him, "What's your class after this?"

The boy peeked at his schedule, "Er...choir. Yeah, it's choir."

I grinned. "Hey, that's my next period also! See you there!"

"Sayonara, Sukone-chan!" (A/N: Google Spellcheck does not think Japanese is words. But then again, Google knows absolutely nothing, and the translator is a lie! A LIE! Even though that's where I got all the French from it, it was a last resort, as I couldn't just go ask Hikagamrine-san for French lessons. That would be weird. I FINALLY DID IT LITTLEGIRLCAT-CHAN!) I blushed as he walked away? Who IS this dude anyway? And who gave him permission to make me blush? Certainly not me! Now I have to sit through this stupid Biology class, Teto sitting right next to me, getting 100s on everything. I DON'T CARE HOW FAST FROGS GROW! When will I ever need this?

I took a test on how the frogs grow. Yay. Pre-test are so _so_ much fun... Gah... This is sarcasm.

Finally, the period was over, and I get to go to a class that I actually enjoy. Yes! I love it! You might not expect that from someone with my personality, but it's true. Of course, Teto's better at it than me. She's better at everything! But I've actually been working on something... I wrote it... Yeah...

The room was absolutely beautiful! Four rows of chairs stacked on risers, labeled alphabetically: row 1 A-G, row 2 H-M, row 3 N-R, row 4 were posters everywhere that were all fun and colorful..., There were awards everywhere, as this was a very advanced choir. I felt almost at peace, until the seating

As I sat in the third row. S. S for Sukone! I know how the alphabet works. I have to be isolated, and Teto and...he looks like a Hayato, so until I figure out his name, blond boy is Hayato. Hayato's last name apparently also starts with K, because he's right next to Teto.

The teacher walked up to the chalkboard. She was a pretty girl with a long side-ponytail sticking out of her blond head. "Yeah, so I'm Neru, but you little brats can all call me Miss Masuda. I don't want to be here..."

"Quit fooling around, Neru!" Another woman arrived looking a lot like Neru. "I'm sorry, class, my daughter's highschool hadn't started until tomorrow, so she's here with me. I'm Masuda-sensei, and welcome to choir! If you took this elective, you must be working on singing, right? So could I hear you sing... anything you've been learning? Masuda-sensei looked really happy about this... I could almost see Megpoid nearly dying of shyness.

Instantly, a teal-headed girl's hand shot high up in the air. I recognized her as one of the girls from Teto's lunch table. When she was called, on, she got up, and began to play the notes on the piano in the center of the room.

Anata to irareru soredake de  
Denshi no kokoro, furueru no  
Maru de ryoushi no kaze mitai ni  
Watashi no kokoro, yusaburu no

It was amazing, how in just four lines, she had captivated the entire choir. I- I really couldn't believe she wrote that... It made my example: Psychotic Love Song, seem like something written by an amateur. Upon hearing scribbling, I saw Tone Rion writing down every word on her notepad, like your typical reporter. Figures. That girl, she just sang it perfectly... Snap out of it, Tei! Okay!

It was my turn. There was no escaping this. I gathered my courage and stood up, silver hair falling in my face. "A-ah..." My eyes squeezed tightly closed, and my face started to turn red. I was starting to think that I couldn't. But I just sang it out, almost like I had no control over what my voice was doing. And now it was singing, the best it had ever sang before. My Psychotic Love Song.

YANDE YANDE HAYAKU YANDE  
Kono mama ja kowarete magirete shimai sou  
NAITE NAITE NAMIDA KARETE  
Sore na no ni imada kono mi wa nureta mama... TSUMETAI

I couldn't play the piano. I can play the knife. It works really well with... I glanced up at the purple-haired girl scribbling down the lyrics...her blood on it...

Wait, what? I know I like to kill things, it's an unhealthy obsession of mine, but still...Why would I want to play the knife with Rion? I mean, I can't play any other instruments, but still... That's simply barbaric...

Now it was her turn to sing. Rion sang... nicely. A song called Lullaby of Snow or something. She wasn't too bad. It's not like I was jealous of her cute voice or anything. How immature would that be?

Mrs. Masuda's daughter looked bored the entire time, regardless of who was singing. I decided that there may have to be a missing high-school student when it started... No. I promised Luka and Ted that I would behave for this year. If I could.

Yeah, Neru really wasn't that nice to us...

You're right, Teto...wait, wouldn't this look weird on the recording? If you just randomly say something like that...

Meh, I did it before.

Okay...

Where am I?

Rin-chan, you should know that we're in the basement with a tape recorder. It is your basement.

No, Teto, I meant the story

I haven't met you yet, and you haven't saved me from Rion.

Well, then, just skip to that day! I deserve to be in here, too, desho?

Hai, hai...

It was about a week in, and I was holding my new copy of the school paper. Just how good of an article writer is this girl? Can Rion Tone even write an article?

Ah! Her article was front page news...

This report has just came in!

 _During the first day of choir, five singers sing love songs as their demonstration of their voices. Miku Hatsune sang Electric Angel, Rin Kagmine and Rin Rin Signal, Tei Sukone gave an admittedly horrible song titled Psychotic Love Song... The poor idiot didn't even know how to play the piano along with it. Gumi Megpoid sang First Affection, and lastly, Teto Kasane performed Fukkireta._

 _The members of the newspaper committee believe they were all directed towards the same person: Len Kagamine. This is believed because we know how Miku and Len were really close in early childhood. Might he make her "electric heart tremble in delight"? Teto was found chatting with him in the choir room. In cheesy romance FanFictions, a small chat may just lead to love._

 _Rin is his own twin sister. And this is a Japanese school, where incest is accepted, right? In France we're more dignified...But the point is, They have literally been together since birth, right? Might they like each other?_

 _Gumi has been known to be calmed out of her infamous suicidal dramatic states by standing next to him, which just HAS to mean something... And with a girl like her, she can't have had many affections without being turned down with the guy running away screaming._

 _And...Ohohoho, this is good...Tei Sukone was found stalking him in the hallway, using the excuse that she was following him to get back to the lunchroom! So what do you think, readers? Is it all just coincidence that these girls have reasons to be close to Mr. Kagamine? Or were all their love songs for him? Send in your letters with replies, and I will choose the best ones to be put in the paper. If they are, then this is better than a love triangle, it's a love hexagon!_

 _Au revoir until next time, readers!_

 _-Rion Tone_

Excuse me? Stalking? And I'm apparently a poor idiot? I turned to throw the paper in the trash, but found myself face to face with our friend the reporter.

She smirked, "Fufufu...I told you I can manipulate reputations of others at will. You should've accepted my offer..." Rion waved cheerfully, and skipped off out into the crowd of our classmates.

I sunk back down on the bench, and groaned. Stupid Rion... I didn't even realize the girl sitting next to me until her white ribbon accidentally floated over to my nose, causing me to sneeze.

It turns out the girl was reading the paper I forgot to throw away. She sat back straight and turned to me. "Gosh, I can't believe her... She hares information based on a hunch, and purposefully makes those four other girls look bad! He's my brother! I mean sure, Japan has less of a problem with it than other countries, but she didn't have to go and call it indignity!"

I didn't say anything. Judging by what she said, this girl was Rin Kagamine. She looked more like Hayato than whoever this Len person was...Unless Hayato is Len. Big plot twists. The universe definitely has turned my life into a series of twisted apocalypses.

Eventually, I nodded in agreement, and continued to read the lunch menu and sport clubs on the other side of the paper...and wondering what on Earth would the Clover Club do? I ripped open the small breakfast box I was carrying with me, and nibbled on my natto-egg-rice mixture, one of my favorites.

Rin looked over at me, "Are you okay? Your eyes are glowing, and you're wielding your fork like a knife..."

With one skilled move, I shredded Rion's article into pieces using just the fork. I put my fist to my mouth to conceal the insane laugh that would I knew blare out instantly if I provided no resistance. It felt so good to destroy again... "I-I'm sorry I have to get to class."

When I entered the first period Language Arts room, Megpoid's red hood was pulled back over her head, her green locks sprawled over the desk. She had buried her head in her arm...is that...blood?

I jerked her head up to see a pair of scissors making a cut in her forehead. I quickly ripped the scissors out of her forehead, and covered the gash with my tan blazer. I lifted the girl into my arms, and ran as fast as I could to the nurses office. All the blood loss had made her unconscious. As soon as I got her into the office, the nurse seemed really surprised. "Gumi Megpoid (A/N: I decided to stop capitalizing it because they're supposed to be humans in this one...) The guidance counselor told us how much she visits...but she's never actually attempted suicide..."

"Less chitchat. YOU ARE THE FREAKING NURSE! WHAT KIND OF NURSE JUST BLABS ON WHILE A STUDENT IS ABOUT TO BLEED TO DEATH!?"

The nurse was wrapped up into her own monologue, and couldn't hear my yells at her. Another person with a death wish, or at least in my opinion. Meaning they tick me off.. I thought about how glad I'd be to help her along with that...

But then I laid Megpoid on a bed, remembering priorities. I found some gauze, and wrapped her head in it. I stole the nurse's hat...Don't give me that look, Rin! She was still talking to the empty air and didn't notice.

But still, it's stealing...

Is a stolen hat, or Gumi's life more important? To get back to the subject, I crammed the hat on Megpoid, to keep the gauze on. And that should stop the bleeding...But she lost a lot of it...

I sighed and poked a nearby syringe into my arm, filling it with my own blood. I injected it into Megpoid, and repeated a few more times, until she had a good amount of blood in her body. I pulled out my cell phone, and texted Teto to tell the teacher I was going to be late because the nurse is a baka.

I then waited for Megpoid to wake up. It took a while before she started to stir. By then, I had been studying a textbook in the nurse's office, and found out that I should treat her gash with hydrogen peroxide. I gently laid her over the sink, removed the gauze and hat, placed her goggles over her eyes, and poured the liquid from the brown bottle. I was pretty sure the sting awoke her, because she began to twitch (And was reduced to just a stitch of what was once the wicked wotch! DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD! Ding dong, the witch is dead. Which old witch? The wicked witch! Wake up you sleepyhead... Can you blame me for just singing this medley in a concert? It got stuck...) Her green eyes fluttered open, tinted slightly red by her goggles.

"Wh-wha...? I never imagined this would be my afterlife...Oh, no...This is the nurse's office! I must've been rescued. I see the nurse has her hat on, but she looks like a school girl..." Gumi read her thoughts aloud. I was now wearing the nurse hat- oh, come on Rin, we both know I make a better nurse than her. Plus it looks better on me.

"I am a schoolgirl. You attempted suicide, and I'm now saving you, because the nurse is a ba- no- TRIPLE baka, that likes the sound of her own voice too much. My name is Sukone Tei." I gave a small wave, and re-wrapped the gauze around her head. I knew now to tie the gauze on after reading the nurse manual. "Don't worry, you'll be just fine. Want me to walk to class with you?"

I helped Megpoid off the bed, and handed her the books I had asked Teto to bring via text messaging. She picked them up shakily, "A-Arigatou, Sukone-san...You are very kind."

I bit back a laugh, "I always give mercy if I'm not the killer. I wouldn't call it kindness..." Why was I suddenly so tired? It must be the loss of blood, seeing as I gave about a quart of it to Megpoid. But I could go without it, and be strong. She couldn't at the time. As we walked down the halls I was bothered by something, "The real nurse said that the counselor had said that you talk about committing suicide, but have never actually attempted it. Why did you choose now?"

Megpoid reached into the pocket of the red hoodie she wore instead of the school's tan blazer, and pulled out a very familiar looking newsletter. I had forgotten that she was also a victim of Rion Tone. That girl...she's asking for it. Come choir last period...she'll be taken down. A popular song right now would be Okochama Sensou...I'm not sure if Rion knows it, but she'd better try to keep up with me...

Choir finally came after the long day. I saw my chance before Masuda-sensei got into the room. Megpoid knew what was about to happen, as I had told her, and frankly, I could only play the knife... She jumped on the piano, and began to play the opening of the song, a huge grin on her small face. She probably would love to see her defeated...to see justice

I pulled Rion down as well, shouting "It's a challenge!" at her.

I then started the opening phrase

Mukashi mukashi no sono mata mukashi  
Toaru kizoku no nakayoshi na kyoudai  
Ikaryaku!

Rion smirked, "Chanto yare!"

Jii ya ga yobu seki ni tsuke yō idon!  
Naifu to fōku de ousen itashi mas-KYAAAA!

I was surprised at this, as there was no KYAAAA in the song.

"Just what do you three think you're doing?" Masuda-sensei had stormed into the room.

"It was Tei's idea!: Rion peeped out immediately. What a coward for someone with such a big ego. I held my gaze, unlike her.

Masuda-sensei smiled, "Well, whatever it is, don't stop! You girls are doing great! And, the piano is very well played, Megpoid-san."

Rion blushed, feeling like the idiot she was. You know, I bet playing the knife on Rion would be a good ending for the song... No, that can wait until the end of the day...What's this?

"A, misaku- mikazu- what? I can't keep up!" The music had slipped away right under Rion's nose. So then, it looks like I won!

 _CHEATER_! Ah, yes. Italics. Meaning a new newspaper

 _Tei Sukone had been cheating in a song battle. The newspaper staff found a tape record of the original voice, belonging to none other than Tei Sukone. Those of you who read the last article that this girl is both a stalker, and a cheater. Poor Rion Tone, the losing end of the song battle was terrified, "I just can't believe anyone would do this to me! I wanted to sing- fair and square. But she wouldn't let me...and now she'll probably come for me now that I've told the newspaper" Rion-chan was in tears during the interview, and the poor girl is expecting the worst. We know what Sukone has done, but who knows what she'll do next?_

Lies. That's all this girl was full of.

HOLD IT ALL!

Sigh...what is it now, Teto-onee?

The main story is supposed to be in high school. Could we try to wrap this up?

Okay, so basically what happened here is that I made friends with Rin Kagamine and Gumi Megpoid, and an enemy out of Rion Tone. I... also have developed a crush on Len, Rin's brother, but she doesn't know that yet.

Wait, what!? Onii-chan...?

Never mind, she knows now. Ahehe...

Yeah...onto the next chapter.


	3. Sukone Tei: Obsessed

It had to be obsession. What else could it be? Tei couldn't stop watching him, she couldn't stop thinking about Kagamine Len. It had been a while since she started high school, and he was all she could think about. Befriending him in middle school wasn't enough...

TETO-CHANNN!

What is it now, Rin-chan?

You can't start a tape like that! You have to greet the people listening first!

But it isn't like anyone will listen anyway. Nobody cares about the reasons I have.

Aw, don't be like that Onee-chan! They love you!

No, I'm pretty sure they don't...

Okay, okay! Tei-chan, stop being pessimistic. Teto-chan..., just READ THE SCRIPT AND TELL THE STORY! The people listening don't want to hear this on a recording!

But can't you edit it out, Rin-chan?

Trust me, Teto-chan, I would if I could. But they hear it all, because it's a cassette player that we use to record. So tell the story please.

Fine, fine. Ahem! Befriending him in middle school wasn't enough to satisfy her. Tei couldn't be satisfied as she sat at her lunch table, halfheartedly eating. Why can't he just...be not so...obsession-worthy?! And that stupid Rion too. Tei just wanted to...kill her! But she knew that wouldn't work. Tei couldn't kill someone. But still, she'd like to. What was that stupid group she was in again? Tei didn't care. But then Len...

"Still thinking about him?" Mayu sat down next to her.

Tei gave her a weak smile , "I might be...how could you tell?"

Mayu points to her red face, "You blush whenever you think about him. And you've been blushing a lot. Do you want to talk about it, Tei-chan?"

Tei shakes her head, "No, I'd rather keep this to myself. Thanks anyway, Mayu-chan... Enough about my problems, what have you been up to? Any more plots coming to you lately?" Mayu was a bit of an author...no, a LOT of an author. She posts her stories on some creative writing site. I've read a few of them, and they're REALLY good. Mayu keeps denying her talent though, and it ticks both me and Tei off!

Teto-onee, you know you aren't supposed to use first person...I don't even know if I was supposed to last chapter...

Aw...I don't want to read the script anyway, Onee-chan. I'll be the commentary some more, and you read it.

QUIT WASTING TIME!

Sorry, sorry. Jeez, Rin-chan. Tei-onee, please read on.

Okay... Mayu was a great writer, but she kept denying her talent.

"Well, actually, there was one today that I had a night...but I forgot about it!" Mayu giggled sheepishly.

I laughed, "That's a lot like you, Mayu-chan."

Just then, some vibrant purple hair came up to Mayu, " _Bonjour,_ Mayu."

Mayu sighed, "What do you want, Tone-san?"

Tone Rion giggled, "Tone? We're friends, Mayu, call me by my first name. So, anyway, any extracurricular activities you're joining?" Rion had been trying to get Mayu to join her newspaper committee ever since Mayu had transferred to this school.

Mayu interlocked her fingers so they made a flat surface, supported by her elbows, and rested her chin on the surface, "Extracurricular activities? You mean like..." She smiled sweetly up to Rion, "Chop off your head?"

Rion laughed nervously, "I'm sorry, Mayu, that isn't what I meant. See, you're a great writer, and I would love it if you would join the..."

Mayu cut her off, "Not interested. Leave me alone."

Rion stomped off. "How rude!"

When she left, I giggled, "That...that was AMAZING!"

Mayu smirked, "Well, Tone is an annoying brat. How else would I deal with her?"

I laughed, and put on a fake accent, "Tone? Call me by my first name, we're friends! Join the newspaper! A _u revoir merci,_ " I gave up, not knowing a word of French...wait...what is this...? My heart skips a beat as I see him walk by.

He walks by talking with Shion Kaito and Hatsune Mikuo, his blonde hair sticking out like a sore thumb among the blue. He turns to face the table Mayu and I are sitting at, "Konnichiwa, Tei-chan!" He gives me a smile, and I turn beet-red. I should just say Konnichiwa in return, but I can't I can only sit there and stare at his ocean-blue orbs. It's not like he'd notice me staring anyway. Why would he even bother to notice my obsession.

Mayu poked my flaming cheek, "You're obsessing again."

I sighed, "Mayu-chan, isn't there anything you obsess over?"

Mayu was at a loss for words. "Well, um..."

I buried my head in my arms on the table, "Then you can't hope to understand."

How exactly do you obsess over something?

Asked Teto who isn't supposed to be part of the story yet.

Not funny, Rin-chan. Not funny at all.

Look, you'll be in the story in a second, so be quiet, and let Tei read.

Arigatou, Rin-chan...Here goes... Since Mayu and I were very early to lunch we got the privilege - if you can call it that - of watching the students file in. Gumi, Sonika, Rin, Miku, and Teto joined Mayu and I at the table. Yes...here I was stuck with Gumi-chan, Mayu-chan, and a bunch of hyperly happy people. I decided to try and make conversation, "So, Miku-chan, I hear you have a singing audition coming up...are you excited."

Miku bounced in her seat. She was the awesome singer I first saw in middle school, "You mean that Vocaloid audition thing? You bet I'm excited! I came up with something! I call it "White Letter!"" She truly was excited for this. I thought about entering, too, I mean Mama is part of that group... Teto said she was going to try, as did Rin and Gumi... but there's no way any of us will surpass Miku... Well, come to think of it, I hadn't heard Gumi sing (Well, of course I have now, but at the time, she never wanted to...) Who knows? But, to be back on topic, I kind of wanted to try out...I mean, there's always my Psychotic Love Song, or maybe something else...

Gumi spoke up, "Oh...I was going to try out for that, too...I mean, I'd never be any good at that, but there's no harm in at least trying it out, right?" Gumi gave a weak smile, and tugged at her red hat (Once upon a time, it was the hood of the favorite red jacket she grew out of. Teto sewed it into a hat for her.)

"Hm...then a lot of us are going, aren't we?" thought Rin aloud, "Len and I were going to try to break the rules and audition as a pair."

"You're a natural rule breaker, aren't you?" Mayu giggled. "Anyway, that makes four of us...I'm not the best singer, but I might as well give it a shot!"

"Since you're all so excited about it, I think I'm going to try out too!" Teto declared, and faced me, her pink eyes begging, "You're going to, also, right, Onee-chan?"

I smiled. What could I do about it, "Sure. I think I'll try it...What about you, Sonika-chan?"

She sighed,"Yeah, I've kind of got to. I might make it, most likely not, though."

Gumi patted her friend's shoulder, "Don't be like that, Sonika-chan. You have such an awesome alto voice!"

Sonika grinned, "Thank you, Gumi-chan. That's so nice of you to say!"

Mayu placed her head in her hands, and stared at Sonika and Gumi with a slightly creepy smile on her face

"Ma-Mayu-chan...?" Gumi asked.

Mayu caught herself, "O-Oh...sorry...You guys are just adorable~!"

I knew what she had meant, but it was best not to mention that. Instead, they took it as a compliment, "Aw...thank you Mayu-chan...but really, Gumi-chan's the adorable one." Sonika laughed

Gumi hugged the girl, "You make me blush when you say that!"

I saw Mayu take out her notepad under the table and jot something down, reminding me of Hiyori Tamura from Lucky Star.

Well...There's really no point in continuing here. I could either end this tape, but that'd be a waste of film, or just add in a way to skip time...So...um...let's just go to the auditions then. This is what would be known as a transition, right?

I looked around the room, taking in everything...there were so many people here. We would all have to sing something for the judges, one of which was my junior high choir teacher. The others were a little boy wearing green...seriously? Who let this kid judge? And...a lady wearing a red outfit that showed too much skin in my opinion. Her short brown hair looked strangely...familiar. I brushed it off knowing there's no way I could have seen this woman before.

I was bored out of my mind waiting, until long purple hair swished past me. T-Tone Rion? ...No, it was some samurai man that looked so similar to her he could have posed as her and died in order to save her life. I was very glad that that wasn't Rion...She would've put this in her stupid newspaper and insult my singing talent...AAAH! IT'S RION! Oh, wait, no. It was just some girl who looks like a faeries...Can faeries sing? I didn't know, or really care. However, I do care that there are too many people with long, purple hair in the world.

(A/N:The faerie girl's name is very difficult. I can't tell if it's supposed to be Meruri, Meluli, Meruli, Meluri, Merri, Melli, Merli, or Melri...The letters are hard to tell if I take out the U, or change the R to an L or not. But, for the rest of this story, I'm calling her Meruri, because it makes more sense because it is read that way on the box. At least the image I am familiar with.)

"Okay! Wish me luck!" I was so busy getting lost in my own mind, that I didn't realize it was Miku's turn to go into the studio where the judges had gone in. As I waited for her to come out, I heard,

Kumo no kirema kara hirahira  
Fushigina tegami ga todoi ta

It was pretty cute, and based on Miku's smile when she emerged, she was pretty happy about this. I guess it went well.

Rin squealed happily, "That means it's our turn now!" She high-fived Len, and they both skipped in. It sounds cheesy, but I could only hear my heart beating as he passed me by.

Then, Gumi, then Sonika, then Mayu, then Teto. Finally, I was the last of us, "Ugh, let's just get this over with," said the tiny kid-judge wearing green, after taking one glance at me. I try to ignore him, and start singing on the cue

Sora wa haiiro kumoyuki mo ayashiku  
Maru de boku no kokoro mitai da ne onaji da ne  
Potsuri hitosuji ochite kita shizu-

"Okay, okay, we've heard enough!" droned that green-wearing brat. His accent sounded quite familiar

The judge in red looks troubled about something, "Excuse me for this being off topic, Sukone-san, but... Are you familiar with the name Yowane Haku?"

I shake my head, even though I recognize it mildly. Must be some singer Teto showed me that she aspired to be like someday. I can't even remember where I heard it.

"Oh, um...this may not be the time for that. Please continue." The judge bows, and I open my mouth to start the line I was cut off on over again.

"No, no, no ,no ,no. We all know how awful you are at singing. Just leave." I really want to kill that snot-nosed kid.

I slam my hands on the table in front of the kid "Look, kid, I don't know how you got into this power, or why ANYONE would let you do this, but the rules say, no, they SPECIFICALLY STATE I am allowed to continue until I finish the song! So SHUT UP until then, understand?!"

He stands up on the table, and my eyes intensify...Why is this in the script? Who says that, ever?

Well, I was going for a bit of...you know, drama when I wrote this...Like, some big vocabulary. Except it might be wrong because our stupid author can't English well.

Sigh...You and your effects, Rin-chab... Anywaaaaay, back to the event

"Who...the hell...do you...think...you are?!" I seethed

He glared at me, "Tone "Gachapoid" Ryuto! And you had better remember it when I become the best Vocaloid of them all!"

Miss Masuda sighed, "As if. The only reason you're even in this organization is because you caused a scene, and your older sister blackmailed us to let the both of you in. And you also can't stand any singer better than you, which is all of them, so you just say they're all terrible. Thank you for letting me express my thoughts. Please continue, Sukone-san...Sukone-san..! Tei-san!" The bubbly energy from the Lili Masuda I knew a few years back had returned to her, "Oh my gosh! You used to be one of my students, right? You loved music so much that you challenged that really nasty purple-head to a singing battle! Just between you and me, " She started to whisper instead of shout, "I never liked her, but you were one of my favorites." Miss Masuda winked, "Oh, um, sorry, please finish."

I finished singing, and I hope I did well. After stopping for lunch at a nearby cafe.

Thank goodness it wasn't a maid cafe. we had a bad experience there, once. I think it was sometime after this...

Be quiet, Teto, we're getting to that later. Try not to use up all the tape, because I need to add some language notes on the end, okay?

Okay, okay. Since there were a bunch of people trying to win this thing, we had time to stop at a cafe, and make it back to the Vocaloid studio. Just as the last boy went in to sing, we were back. After a 4-minute period of time, some copies of a sheet of paper was put at the front desk with the results.

Everyone that had come with our group had made it, and Miku seemed to be they're first choice. Well, not exactly everyone. I was the only one who didn't become part of the Vocaloid group. I don't really care, honestly. It was Teto's adorable face that I would hate to see disappointed that I joined in the first place.

Gumi was sitting over on a bench, trembling. Sonika noticed this scene, and brought the paper over to the poor girl. I couldn't hear there conversation, but it ended up with Gumi blushing furiously, and Mayu's nose bleeding.

You know what, Teto, this was your own heartbreak, so I'm going to let you tell the story at this point, okay?

R-Really? And Rin won't tell me to be quiet?

Really!

Yay!

Now you make me sound like a bad person...

You are, Rin-chan.

EXCUSE ME?! Tei, I trusted you!

Woah, it was a joke, okay? Teto can tell the story now.

U-Um, okay. So, I was very exited to get into this program. It has really been my dream since I was a little girl. Mama was in it, and is still to this day. So I was overjoyed, and happy, which are the same thing, and... Um... well, the intercom turned on.

"Attention everyone in the building! As you may know, today is April 1st!" announced the voice of the kid judge in green, "As a joke, we added one more person then we were supposed to. An April Fools to Kasane Teto! You aren't really in the program, and we hope you don't hold our joke against us, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

The room filled with laughter. Easy for them to laugh. They didn't have their hopes and dreams ripped away from them as quickly as they worked to achieve them. My face grew as white as a sheet of paper, and I chomped down hard on my lip to hold back tears. Of course it didn't work. It never will. Cutting your lip open with your teeth will only stain your shirt red and make you want to cry even more. My pink twin-drills bounced as I ran crying into the bathroom just as three judges came into the main room where all the contestants were waiting.

I was huddled in the bathroom when all this happened, so back over to Tei.

Got it. No film wasted. I was outraged as that little snot-faced green-clad, stupid Tone boy walked in with a little snot-faced green-clad stupid Tone smile on his little snot-faced green-clad stupid Tone face. I was so mad, my insults didn't even make sense!

I stood up on the front desk and everyone was surprised.

I was making this up on the spot, but apparently I am a pretty good composer when I'm angry. I grabbed a random conveniently placed microphone (No, Rin, nothing is strange about its convinient placement. It is a singing program studio, after all) and shouted into it a song made up

"Subete no Vocaloid ni tsugu."  
Kyou kara aratame watashi ga shunjikou desu  
"Iron ga aru mono wa mae ni de nasai."  
Iron ga aru mono wa mae ni de nasai.

I did not know what I was talking about. I didn't really want to be the main character. I guess I just figured things would be better if I were in charge; Everyone looked on in surprise as I continued

Omae no osoreru mottomo zangyakuna houhou de kowashite yaru

Now THAT was a line that I was exited to sing. I would destroy them all in the most brutal way possible.

Totsuzen desu ga oshirase ga zai rimasu."  
Kyou kara watashi ga sekainokisoru to naru  
"Iron ga aru mono wa mae ni de nasai"  
Iron ga aru mono wa mae ni de nasai

That's right! I have the rules to the world, so if you have objections, GET OUT!

Omae no osoreru mottomo zankokuna goumon de kowashite yaru

Again, I would like to destroy them all with brutal torture! They deserve it for treating a Teto like that.

The verse continues with me not knowing what I was doing. Well, I hope Teto was okay with this.

I grab the kid by his green scarf and throw him out the window

"Totsuzen desu ga rouhoou ga zai rimasu.  
"Kyou kara kono sekai no chuushin wa watashi  
Midori ni tsuku mono wa mae ni de nasai."  
Midori ni tsuku mono wa mae ni de nasai

Oh, look who's wearing green. I'm glad you're having fun flying through a window.

Sou yo kore wa ikeru kirai subete he no  
"Sensen fukoku" na no

I grinned as I yelled that. I declare war on all the Vocaloid, what are you going to do about it? The majority of the audition was clapping their hands to the music that came out of nowhere (Yes, Rin-chan, the author can't provide an explanation for this one. My song automatically has an instrumental to it. There. You win.) I skilfully tossed the microphone and caught it.

Subete wa yami he yami wa mu he to  
Sono saki wa "subarashiki seka"  
Iu nareba unmei wo kimeru kami no "kotoba"  
"Whole Note"  
Kirai wa suouiro ni sabi subete wa "tomaru"  
Watashi ni kudare subete no Vocaloid-tachi"  
Saishuu tsuukoku" yo

With my last "That is all" I leapt from the desk, and went to join Teto in the bathroom.

"Nee, Onee-chan."

"Oh, H-Hi Onee-chan..."

"If it makes you feel any better I kind of declared war on them all, and threatened to destroy them in the most brutal way possible, and also lobbed a kid out a window."

"Um..."

"More importantly, exactly WHAT are you doing!? In all the seven stalls in this bathroom, you chose the third one to hide in! Practically asking for a haunting. I rapped three times on the stall door, "You'd better leave my sister alone, Hanako-san!"

I heard a soft "I'll protect her," from the air. Huh. So they ARE real. And hopefully, she's at least friendly to Teto.

"So, do you want to go home?! " I asked, and held my hand out.

Teto grabbed it, and stood up. "You know, if I turned out to be the older sister, this would be kind of sad."

"Why?" I asked, "What if we happened to be twins, like Rin-chan and...L-Len-kun."

Teto giggled and then looked at me, confused, "Why is your face all red, Onee-chan...?''

Gah! It was? "What are you talking about?"

"You just got really red after Len-kun was mentioned..." Teto gasped, and gave an evil smirk, "You like him, don't you? Heh heh!"

"Tei-chan and Len-kun sitting on a tree..." chimed in the ghost.

"Shut up before I break your ectoplasmic neck!" I shouted.

"Len-kun," Teto said, and watched me slowly become a tomato.

I sighed and gave in, "Okay, well...um...I may have...a small...obsession"

Teto smiled and placed her hand on my shoulder."That is called love! And I will SO TOTALLY SHIP IT! Yes! I'll do everything possible to make sure your love becomes a reality!"

W-Wait, I know this happened, but what if Len-kun didn't like me back? Would that have stopped Teto?

Hm. Well there goes our super-awesome Teto-guts-girl ending. You of all people should know, Tei, once Teto-chan puts her mind to something, there is absolutely no stopping her. And...cut the recording! Ending is back!

Woah, wait!-


	4. Teto's Message and Joke About A Chicken

Yes, it is my time! Time for me, Teto! My space! Watashi no jikan! Rin-chan is at her house, and Tei is upstairs reading. So, I have to tell you that a lot of things happened that we wanted to record, but we didn't get back to the city until just now!

Buuuuuuut...

WE CAUGHT IT ON VIDEO! ! !

So, since someone's turning these recordings into a FanFiction on the Internet, we figured video would be a lot less awkward.

Oh! Since this is going to be on the Internet, I can say anything I want! And it'll be posted on the Internet!

Um...um...okay! So Mr. Chicken went to work...and he had to do public speaking. He got arrested later that day for attempted robbery because he was a chicken and kept demanding the audience's bucks!

Hee hee...because a chicken says "Buck!" Get it?

Okay, yeah! We have videos! TETOOOOOO AWAAAAAYYYY!


	5. Sukone Tei: Confused

**Just a reminder, this is on video instead of recording now. Except for this. This bold text is not part of the story. Also, the camera makes no sense in a very convenient way.**

"Teto-chan, Tei-chan!" Rin stopped in front of them on the sidewalk.

"Eh? What's the problem, Rin-chan?" Teto asked, surprised by her friend's aura of urgency.

Rin looked around at all the people, "It- It isn't safe to talk here. I asked the others to meet us at that one cafe near here... Teto, what is with the video camera?"

Teto shrugged, "I conveniently have it with me at the exact times we need to record a video so we don't have to sum up everything we do with a tape recorder."

"I see. Even you could think rationally and not be a total airhead sometimes! " Rin declared

Tei felt her fists clench against her will. Teto took it as a compliment, "Aw, thanks, Rin-chan!"

"Heh...um...I was kind of insulting you... BUT YOU ARE SO MUCH OF AN AIRHEAD THAT YOU TOOK IT AS A COMPLIMENT! But this does not matter, OUT TO THE CAFE WE GO!"

"Irashaimase, Ojou-sama!" Momo Momone smiled.

"M-Momo-chan?" Teto asked, surprised. Tei was surprised as well. Momo was a member of the club Teto was starting, a sort of mockery of Vocaloid, where the members still programmed their voices into voicebanks. Tei was not expecting Momo-chan of all people to be working here.

"Tei-chan? Teto-chan? Rin-chan? WHHAAAAAT?! U-Um, you didn't see me. Yeah. Er...I'm not Momone Momo. I'm...um... Mimine Mimi?...Yeah."

Teto grinned, "Oh, hi Mimine-san! My name is Kasane Teto, this is my sister Sukone Tei and my friend Kagamine Rin! Nice to meet you! You look just like my friend Momo-chan!"

"Uh...Nice to meet you, Te-...um...Kasane-san."

Rin facepalmed, "They're both airheads! Anyway, _Mimine_ - _san_ " she said, pronouncing Mimine-san in a sarcastic fashion, "We're looking for our friends that should be here. Do you know where they are?"

"U-Um, I'm sorry, my shift just started...Nee! Meruri-chan! Aoki-chan!" "Mimi" ran over and found two other workers in the maid cafe. Their appearances reminded Tei of faeries.

The older and taller of the two walked over. "I apologize for the inconvenience. There were four girls and two boys, saying that their names were Gumi, Sonika, Miku, Mayu, Len and Kaito. Would they be the ones you are looking for?"

"Yes, that's them!" Rin looked at Meruri questioningly. "Aren't you a Vocaloid?"

Meruri nodded shyly. "A little-known one, as well as my sister Aoki over there, but a Vocaloid nonetheless."

"Um...one more thing!" Teto looked up at the very tall girl, "Are you a faerie?"

Meruri laughed. "Ah, the innocence of it all! Sorry to disappoint you, but I am not a faerie. At least not in my current form...But keep that a secret, okay?" Meruri put her finger to her lips and winked.

I tried to intervene, "But that doesn't make any-"

"I will now escort you to your table." Meruri pushed.

When we got there, everyone was quiet and suppressing laughter. Two junior high students, a boy and a girl seemed to be tutoring each other on English and Japanese.

"Okay, say frog."

"Furog. Kero-kero-kero!"

"Your accent is awful..."

The girl poked him in the cheek angrily, "Kero!"

"Um...well okay then...Ribbit...!"

"Iyaaaaaa...!"

"Haha, I am coming back to bite you!"

"It is my turn! You must say 'sansuu kyoushitsu'!"

"Hey! I only made you say 'frog!" The boy sighed, "Sen sue ki oh shee sue...?"

"Dame dame yo! Mottai nai~! Demo sanja nattame! Demo sanja na hora! Demo sanja na nara zutto ga zutto! "

"That wasn't fair! Then you say...um... microscopic organism""

"Microscopic organism!"

"Gah! And you can't even pronounce frog correctly?"

"Furog! Kero-kero!"

"Ribbit!"

Rin turned the video camera back to the table. "This is completely irrelevant to the thing we need to record! I'll just say it then. One of us at this table is not a real human being!"

"WHAT!? Maybe it's Mayu! Or maybe Miku! It could even be YOU, Sonika-chan!" Teto went back into Secret Agent Teto mode.

Mayu rolled her eyes. "Why am I the fist one you accuse? What about Kaito!? Or anyone at this table at all!

Kaito was just minding his own business with the ice cream he ordered.

"A-actually..." Tei felt her heart flutter when Len spoke up "It's me."

Teto poked him in the arm, "Flesh...I think... Are you sure, Len-kun? This isn't a game set up by Rin-chan?

Rin shook her head. "He...came from a shadow...My shadow."

Sure enough, Tei pointed Teto's purple video camera down towards Rin's feet, and saw that she didn't have a shadow..."How, in the nine years I've known you, did I not notice that?"

Rin shrugged. "Anyway, there are a bunch of scientists from our dad's lab that noticed something weird about their coworker's son. And they want to do tests on him, and..." Rin started to tear up. "I can't let that happen..." Tei's spoon snapped from her clutching it too tightly.

"You're really not human, Len-kun?" Gumi asked.

"Are you telling the truth Rin-chan?" Sonika looked at her.

"Do you want to tell them, Len-nii?" Ri asked him.

"You forgot to bring your notepad, Mayu-san?" Mayu asked herself. Everyone looked at Mayu oddly. "What? I wanted inclusion!"

"Y-Yeah. " Len said. "See, I spawned from a shadow. Which makes me a daemon."

"EEEEEEEH?" yelled Teto. "You mean to tell me this is a spiritual story!?"

Miku was strangely silent.

Meruri and Aoki flew over.

"YOU!" Aoki screamed, pointing at Len. "I should have known it was you!"

"Well, they're flying. And they have wings" Tei observed, "I think we can safely say that the fantasy element escalated quickly."

Kaito lobbed his ice cream at the fairies.

"NOOOOO!" Meruri yelled. "Ice cream! How did you know it was our only weakness!? Noo-o-oooo-ooo!" They began to melt into a pool of glitter.

"We'll respawn later and capture you, daemon! You haven't seen the last of Lapis Aoki!"

"Lapis Meruri, too!"

Everyone gave Kaito a strange look. He held his hands up "I honestly wasn't expecting that to work..."

Mayu stared long and hard at Miku. "She hasn't said anything all day..."

Kaito put his hand on his step-sister's shoulder. "It's okay. She was practicing singing so much, she lost her voice completely.

"Ah..." Miku confirmed in a hoarse voice, smiling apologetically.

Kaito sighed "Quit trying to talk, you goofball. Do you want your voice back or not?"

Miku's mouth moved making hoarse sounds until she finally got the syllables out,"...Ah...ah ...I...If...Le...Len-kuu...i...is a...daem...mon...h-how..."

Mayu failed to make out any of what Miku was trying to say. "If I hadn't forgotten my notebook, I'd give it to you. I can't really understand what you're trying to say, and it can't be healthy to try and talk that much. Hang on, I'll go ask Momo-chan for an order form and a pen."

"Huh? Momo-chan is here?" Teto was confused.

Rin facepalmed. " I'll explain it, Teto. Mimine Mimi was Momone Momo all along. I know, I know, your brain exploded. But listen, Momo-chan doesn't want you to know she's into being a maid. Although personally, I don't mind it."

"Gasp!" Teto exclaimed. "I didn't know that. But of course, Momo-chan is Momo-chan whatever she's into. It's. That. Simple."

"That's a great way to look at it, Onee-chan." Tei encouraged, turning the camera around because her goal was to have it turn to whoever was talking.

"I think it might be a better idea to write everything down." Rin contemplated. "Then Miku could leave her questions in the margins, and so could everyone! It'd all work out, and everyone would get the information...' Rin stopped. "...I think I got to the point of restating myself over and over. Yeah, we should end the recording, Tei."

"Got it."

"Oh, by the way, you all have demonic powers."

"WHAAAAAAAAAAT!?" Everyone exclaimed, except Miku, who couldn't talk.

"I'm back!" Mayu declared. "It turns out Mimi lost the forms for a while. So, what did I miss?"

"You all have demonic powers!" Rin smiled.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAT?!" Mayu yelled.

'"No time, end the video." Rin leaped forward to turn the camera off.

"Hey, you can't just-!"


End file.
